So it Goes

So it Goes

another one is dead
he grew unstuck in time
maybe he was just crazy in the head
he wanted it to end
he was tired of swimming
what happened to all his friends
his head started spinning
he lost his footing and fell
off the window ledge
oh well
so it goes


Hmmm... I don't have any idea what that was about. I just started off with "So it goes" which is a common theme throughout Slaughterhouse Five by Vonnegut when he talks about death.

Anticipation

Anticipation

It's been way too long
Who is on the boat off shore?
Premieres tomorrow


Lost season premiere is tomorrow. I don't know how many months it has been since there has been new content for Lost. I'm hoping it doesn't suck. I have a feeling I won't like where they are taking things. Oh well. I think even though I'm a die hard fan of Lost, the even more extreme die hard fans will keep me into Lost and will sing its praises so much that I won't be able to help but love it.

Pressure

Pressure

I feel the pressure
to maintain poem writing streak
I wish it would end


Man, I was so tempted to just let this streak end and start over again. The longer the streak gets, the more pressure I'll have to write even though I have nothing to write. I can't wait to finish The Sound and the Fury... worst book ever. Seriously.

Fear

Fear

I thought maybe I loved you
It was only yesteryear
I saw you and you saw me
My entire person was filled with fear
What happened to the day in the park
When the thrush sang in the grassy knoll
That's when we shared our first kiss
But fear won in the end and lead to our mutual betrayal


Yup. I had pictured that coming out better than it actually did. Oh well. You win some, you lose some. I finally finished 1984 and this poem is my tribute to the love shared between Julia and Winston.

Words

Words

Words words words
why are there so many words?
daffy, irrational, crazy, absurd


Yup, you're getting to know me pretty well... uninspired. In my slow reading of 1984 I've come across a section where one of the characters is taking part in reinventing the language which they call "newspeak" and the goal of this new language is to simplify the language so that the meanings of words are black and white and therefore, many of the words are being erased from the vocabulary. I think it's an interesting project. I understand the need for so many words because then writers can have more nuances in their writing and show how clever they are by choosing the perfect word for a situation. But at the same time, I do think it would be interesting to see what would happen if the english language was greatly simplified. And while they are at it, maybe they can spell words the way they are pronounced! Why isn't "sure" spelt "shure"? *sigh.

I Need You Closer

I Need You Closer

I want to be near to you
to hear you
to see you

I wish you were near to me
to hear me
to see me

I need you closer
the only thing I don't want
from you is closure


Hmmm... that turned out pretty good for a 2 minute piece. I totally forgot about writing today. I was already in bed reading and then I realized that I didn't write anything yet today. I just spent a few hours watching Youtube videos about drawing the human figure. That's something else I've been interested in lately. I have so much stuff in the air right now. If I'm awake enough, I should be reading because I have so much to read in order to be done the top 100 novels thing. If I'm too tired to be reading, I should be drawing because if I find myself at rest, I should be drawing and practicing/honing my skills. If I'm listening to music, I should be trying to sing harmony with it. If I'm exercising, I should be walking around my memory palace and becoming more familiar with it. How can I be bored? And yet some times I'm just too tired to do anything at all.

Diary

Diary

What's the point of this?
I'm writing to the future
Look back, understand


Totally uninspired today. The diary idea came from the first chapter of 1984 by Orwell. That's about as far as I got. The purpose of the diary is rather interesting... at least to me. I've always written in my diary as if I'm talking to someone. Some times I picture it as some hot girl reading my diary but for the most part, I write in my diary with the future me being the audience that I'm writing to. I dunno. It's strange. It's like communicating with the future. Maybe a diary can explain where everything went wrong, or maybe it can be used to relive a glorious moment in your past when you get old and bitter. I haven't written in my diary much as of late. I blame this blog. It's pretty exhausting to write in here on some days when I feel like I have nothing to say. Anyways, time to watch tennis.

Night Train

Night Train

Half past four
I undress as I sit on the corner of my bed
My shirt stained by the cares of today tossed on the floor
Phantom thoughts occupy my mind
As I attempt to focus on one
It's gone
They leave only a trace of sorrow
Elusive yet its existence is brutally tangible
I can't believe it's already tomorrow
The house shakes with the rumble of the night train
I crawl into bed to get two hours of sleep
and prepare myself for another day
of more of the same


Nice. I like that one. It's 10:16 am. I can't believe I'm getting this done so early today. I just read about 70 pages of The Sun Also Rises by Ernest Hemingway. I really like it so far. It mentioned a night train so that's the inspiration for today. So many of these great books revolve around WW1 and WW2 eras. I guess great books are sad books with characters wandering through life not feeling a part of their world... or longing for the girl that loves you but chooses to be rich instead. Maybe like Robert Cohn, I need to get me to South America and find some inspiration to know what I want to do with the rest of my life. Maybe I need to forget about Brett Ashley and move on.

The Yahoos

The Yahoos

Come take a look at the savage yahoos
they look and walk like we doos
they war over land
and fight with their hands
If you think you're better than them, that's a boo boo


Weak, I know but it's late and I just want to get this done before going to sleep. I just finished reading Gulliver's Travel today. Another book that has animals in it to teach us about ourselves. I wonder if that's a theme in good novels. At least it is a common but efficient method to convey how savage the human race can be at times.

Embrace

Embrace

I dread your embrace
Two people standing as one
I think I'm in love


I'm not sure why I was thinking about hugging today but for some reason I just was. I totally know that physical touch is high on my love languages and therefore, I've been very careful since finding that out. I can remember all the girls I've hugged in the past 10 years easily. Lol, the last girl I hugged... I thought I was in love with her for about a whole month afterwards.

A Smoke Alarm Dying

A Smoke Alarm Dying

What does it sound like?
Intermittent, annoying
Constantly beeping!!!


Smoke alarm was dying today and would occasionally give off a few annoying beeps for no particular reason. I put in a new battery and all is silent again. Obviously I'm very uninspired today. I was reading some chicks blog and it just kinda flowed like Virginia Woolf's writing. I think they refer to the style as stream of conscienceness writing. Apparently that's how Ulysses is written as well. I dunno. I wish that I could write in that style. Just rambling on and on. Not really using proper sentences or punctuation. I'm jealous.

The Ghost Orchid

The Ghost Orchid

You are my fairy tale
the cute girl with the black hair
that falls softly on your shoulders
soft strands hang over your left eye
You smile at me
and playfully blow the hair from your face
dang, you're beautiful
the rare and unattainable ghost orchid
I told you that I've always loved you
and you told me that you never did


Hmmm... I've read over 1000 pages this week and so I thought it would be good to take a break from reading today. My left eye has been twitching for the past few days. I'm sure my eyes are not used to reading so much even though I do read a lot. I need to do my eye exercises that my Youtube speed reading mentor advised.

Tonight I watched Adaptation on TV. It's this movie from 2002 I believe. It was very interesting and very different. It mentioned this flower called the Ghost orchid. I dunno. It just made me think about an idea that I had a few years ago concerning fairy tales... how someone may be your fairytale but it doesn't matter because you're not hers. And because you're not her fairytale, it wouldn't be a fairytale ending if you ended up together... and how that's very sad. I've wanted to write something about that for a while, but I haven't been able to come up with a clever way to portray it as of yet. It's still something I'm working on. Maybe it would make a good country song. I dunno. I hope to one day write it, but alas not today.

Silence

Silence

The dark jungle sleeps along
with all its creatures
The silence is thick and lies
heavy on my chest
I shout out a few notes of a song
in an attempt to alleviate the pressure
The words echo
off distant hills
but the intractable silence creeps back in
and won't let me go


Oh well, I just read Heart of Darkness by Joseph Conrad this morning. I've read the book earlier as part of my first year english course but I don't think I remembered much about it. It's nice to be reading so much and changing authors from day to day so I don't get tired of reading the same style of writing. I found Heart of Darkness to be very similar to the Diablo 2 cinematics. It had the same feel of building darkness. The horror. The horror.

Lighthouse

Lighthouse

She carries her beauty like a lighthouse
that sits on the barren rocks
She stands alone among the crashing waves
and casts her light to guide the brave


I just finished reading To the Lighthouse by Virginia Woolf. It was another book about nothing. Nothing really happened and there was no dialogue really in the entire book. But after reading it, I realized that it indeed was a wonderful book. I wish that I could write like Woolf. At first I was overwhelmed by all the commas and just the flowy-ness of the words but now I have a great respect for it. That being said, I'm not looking forward to the other 98 books I need to read. I'm starting to realize that a lot of these books are going to be long and uneventful.

Pigs

Pigs

the pigs are not my comrades
they live in houses
and sleep on beds
they drink beer
and walk on two legs
they have forgotten the 7 commandments

the pigs are not my comrades
they beat us with whips
and threaten us with their dogs
the pigs are acting like humans
are we doomed to repeat history?


I read Animal Farm today by George Orwell. Hence the poem. Yesterday I read How to talk about books that you haven't read by Pierre Bayard. It was a book about how to talk academically about books by being very vague and junk. The book kinda discouraged people from reading books because reading a book actually makes it harder for you to appreciate it. I dunno. After reading that book, it made me want to read more books that maybe I should have read. I looked online for arbitrary lists of the top 100 novels of all time. I found a list and now I'm gonna try to read them all this year. I started a little late so I'll have to power through it and try to catch up. I need to do a book every 3 days. I currently have 6 books at home to read. Praise the Lord for public libraries.

History Maker

History Maker

She's rewriting history
He was the man of her dreams from the beginning
She wants to have a good story
Something to tell the grandchildren

She's rewriting history
He has never done anything to hurt her
She's forgotten all the misery
And the nights she stayed up crying to you


I don't really know what this piece is about. It just kinda wrote itself once I started. I know that I wanted to write something about "rewriting history" because it's something that's been on my mind lately. Just talking to people about the past, I hear some discrepancies from the stuff that they are remembering and what I remember. I tend to trust my memory better than others especially when the differences in our retelling of the past seems to benefit them. I dunno. I think when it comes to history, I should be the one to give the definitive answer.

Oh yeah, I'm also reading the Pengiun History of Canada. The victors write the history books. Oh well. I'm definitely don't know jack about Canadian history.

Zodiac

Zodiac

Another movie
No satisfying ending
Based on real life right?


I just watched Zodiac and I'm exhausted. I'm tired of these movies that drag on and on and then at the end, there's no real ending. Even if it's based on real cases, fake an ending for me. That would be way more satisfying. Why do people decide to make movies that have no real endings? I don't get it. Maybe it's more "art" that way. Oh well. 2 full weeks of weak poems. Give me a prize.

Bloated

Bloated

Please say something
Let something happen
Please let something happen
600 pages of nothing


I'm uninspired today. I blame it on the book "Eldest" by Paolini. I basically read all 667 pages of it today and boy was it a waste of my time. I'm sure glad I sped read it. Spoiler alert: Nothing happens. Boo-urns to you Paolini.

13

13

Thirteen is a girl on House
Thirteen is also the day that I died (lolz)
Thirteen months was how long it took
I told you I was okay but I lied


I have a bad obsession with 13. It just seems that everything significant in my life either happens on the 13th or the 31st. Nothing happened today though. Lost starts again January 31st. Yay me.

The Game is Over

The Game is Over

The game is over
everyone has already gone home
vague memories are washed away in the shower
nothing can be done to alter the score
it doesn't matter
you were an under dog anyways
she smiles as you leave the stadium
you know he's waiting for her in his car
why'd she even bother to say good bye
you wonder
the music has stopped playing
the band is on her finger


Lolz, back to the old school pieces. Everybody is getting engaged. Since I don't know what it's like to be on the engagement side of things, I decided to write a piece about being on the outside looking in. I was watching Dinner: Impossible earlier on Food network and they were cooking at a baseball game. Hence the baseball/sports metaphor. I dunno. Maybe I'll go back to haikus tomorrow. This streak is getting ridunkulous.

Kate

Kate

There once was a girl named Kate
She was captured by Ben as bait
We can never be one
Kate dammit run
To get off this cursed island is your fate


Lolz, I need to get some sleep because every time I find myself sitting here to write my poem, all I want to do is get off the computer and go to bed. This piece is a Lost reference. Can't wait til it's on again. Season 4 premiere is Jan. 31st.

Harmony

Harmony

Two voices as one
Should I sing over your note?
Lolz, I suck at this


Yup, another lazy day. Just wanted to chronicle that I'm trying to learn to sing harmony. So far I've managed to harmonize 2 notes with a commercial on television and I can sing really awfully with the radio. Oh well. Haiku's are the way to go to keep this streak alive.

Rachel

Rachel

Beautiful brown hair
A smile that showcases teeth
Call me sometime girl


Lolz... that was another joke poem. I tried to make it a haiku but I'm not sure if I know what a haiku is. All I read somewhere was that a haiku is all about 5-7-5. Who's rachel? She's the new VJ on CMT. Hahaha, I have a little crush on her even though I don't think she's that good looking or that good a VJ. Oh well. 8 in a row.

Edit: Oops. Her name is Ashley. Sorry Ashley, my bad.

Moron

Moron

You, my former friend
are a moron
I thought you were nice
but I couldn't have been more wrong
I now include you with
the rest of your clan
All you fools are cowards
Step up, take command
Actually, just don't talk to me again
ever


Commentary removed by censors...

I am Cookie

I am Cookie

My death folder is simple
It's seamless, no wrinkles
My instructions are few
It involves my ashes, that's a clue
Two cups of flour to two table spoons of me
I am cookie


Lolz, I'm getting so lazy. Technically, I didn't write a poem yesterday but it's 12:45am right now so I will still count this as keeping my streak alive since I haven't slept yet. I was watching HIMYM tonight and it was the one where Marshall and Lily had to make death folders for each other in case one of them died suddenly. Marshall made a joke about Marshall brownies. I made the same joke a while back about how I wanted my ashes baked into cookies and served at my funeral. So file this knowledge away for later and enjoy the cookies if you forget.

Tired

Tired

My stomach is uneasy with hunger
My left eye is twitching
It's signaling that I should get some rest
Too bad I phail at sleeping

A knot in my back
Haunts my movements
Like a ghost it disappears
and reappears to discourage my progress


I knew today's poem was gonna be weak since I totally just wanna go straight to bed. I was thinking that I could drag up a poem I wrote at WC a few years ago but I couldn't find it and so I'll save it for a later date. There have been a few engagements around here recently so I have an idea around that theme but I'm too tired to develop it at the moment. I'm just writing that in here so I don't forget. K, sometimes my poems are pure fabrications but seriously, I'm tired.

Uses for a Chair

Uses for a Chair

When I hear your name
I want to throw the nearest chair
at the furthest wall

When I see your face
I need to sit down in the nearest chair
cause I'm afraid I'll fall

Fall in love with you
all over again
I wish I needed glasses
I'm scared for myself because my iPod is slowly making me deaf


Wow, I was really uninspired for this one (it's hard writing everyday)... But I thought it would be fun to go back to my old school poem moods. I dunno why but I've always liked the "I want to throw the nearest chair at the furthest wall" line. I remember feeling that way years ago. It just seems like such an illustrative line and it portrays so much raw emotion. I'm glad I don't punch walls or throw chairs in real life, although at times, I wonder if I wouldn't enjoy it.

As you can see, I tried to start off having a rhyming scheme but I got lazy and left it behind. I think the last section is kinda clever and cute. I dunno. Well, peace out. That's 4 days straight baby!

Wake Up Stress

Wake Up Stress

It's midnight
I should get to bed because I have an important day coming up
I crawl under my covers and
turn off the light

1 am
I'm fine
as long as I sleep fairly soon I'll still get 7 hours of sleep
What is that? Like three cycles of REM?

2
Sheesh.
How did one hour pass so quickly?
Maybe I'll read a chapter of Eldest to get myself tired
She-elf, Arya, I love you

3
My eyes are so tired
but even if I fall asleep right away, I'll only get 5 hours
Maybe playing some mario kart on my ds will help
Hmmm... it's been a while since I played luigi

4
Why am I so awake now?
Maybe I should get out of bed and do something productive
I phail at sleeping

5
I'm so screwed now
No matter what happens, I'm gonna be so tired
What time does the sun rise?

8:22
I hit the snooze button once for good measure


Hmm... that was fairly weak. I don't know how I'm gonna keep this chain alive. Things are getting harder. And I'm running on like 2 hours of sleep, but I want my chain to proudly announce that I've "been getting stuff done for 3 days straight". Why can't I sleep? Because I'm handing in my thesis today. Why is that a big deal? Cause I don't know if grad studies will accept it without any changes and I'm pretty much out of time. I wish I didn't have such a good imagination. I can manage to imagine all sorts of things going wrong.

Anyways, if it wasn't clear in the "poem", wake up stress is something I get when I know that I should get a good night sleep cause I have to be awake at a certain time the next day. And every hour that I lie awake (not sleeping), my mind starts to worry that I won't get enough sleep and the worrying makes it even harder for me to sleep. Worrying - the man-made perpetual motion machine.

One thing about the new year that I don't look forward to is reading Genesis. I'm reading the Bible this year in chronological order of the events that occur in it. It's called the Daily Bible and it's probably the 4 or 5 bible reading program that I've done in recent years. This morning, I read about Nimrod, a mighty hunter before the Lord. I dunno why but I associate the name Nimrod with a stupid, pathetic person... not a mighty anything. What word am I actually thinking of but not remembering properly? Anyways, maybe when my thesis gets approved by the Faculty of Graduate Studies, I'll write a poem titled "w00t", the word of the year in 2007.

70 Minutes to Nowhere

70 Minutes to Nowhere

First time on the bus this year 2008
I'm headed to nowhere and I'm sure to not get there fast
The bus driver announces
McPhillips!
She catches me off guard
I feel like I got married yesterday
perhaps I dreamt that I did
Mountain!
Again she startles me as I try
to remember my dreams from yesterday
Portage!
I was ready that time
I'm making a come back
It's 1-2 for her
Grant!
dang it... 1-3
Why am I even going to school today?
Plaza Drive!
so that's what that street is called
cool
University of Manitoba terminal
I'm here
Can't wait to go home


yeah so today was my first time on a bus since they made the bus drivers announce every stop. I find it rather annoying and unnecessary for the most part. I think if someone needs help on where to get off, they can tell the bus driver and he/she can announce those particular stops.

So, I was heading to school today cause I had nothing better to do and didn't want to just be sitting at home waiting around, babysitting my email. It totally was a waste of my time. I talked to my prof for like 20 seconds after waiting outside his door for over 10 minutes. He was showing a new PhD student around. However, later tonight, I did find out that my thesis rewrites have been approved and I can finally hand it in. Praise the Lord!!

On a total aside, I was looking for the tabs for the Growing Pains theme song and according to the tabber, I had the lyrics wrong all these years. I thought the line was "we know we're near the end" but the tabber had it as "we're nowhere near the end". Hmmm... that is a lot happier than my version. Yesterday, my adsense had an ad for depression poems. I'm gonna try to right some more happy stuff or at least stuff about products like Sony Playstation and Xbox 360 in order to get that ad off my blog. Although I think it is random cause when I checked again this morning, it was an ad for Maya Angelou... who knows. Peace out. Oh, as I write this, I'm drinking a root beer with banana rum. My belly is all warm now. Yay for me.

I'm gonna try to post more (no poem)

I'm gonna try to write more often. Hopefully every day. I ran across this tool on digg.com the other day. It's called dontbreakthechain.com and it is a visual tool that helps you to form better habits. The goal is to do something everyday in order to keep the chain alive. As a gamer, I like the idea of chains. Hopefully, I will be able to make some decent chains... and maybe I won't convince myself that if I write two poems one day, I can take the next day off.

Cherry

Cherry

why is cherry so popular?
it tastes like cough medicine
the flavour of red should be strawberry
or even watermelon


I'm not sure why cherry has become such a popular flavour. I think perhaps that it's just something that we've inherited. Nowadays, all the big stars are all about being green. And the sentiment is that we don't want to leave our children and grandchildren with a destroyed world. Well I say, what about the previous generations that decided that anything red would most likely be cherry flavoured? What about THAT crime to humanity? Most children these days associate the cherry flavour to cough medicine. Why is that a such a popular flavour for candy?

As I type this, I realize that I may be thinking about this backwards. Maybe people love cherry so much that they need to make awful stuff like cough medicine taste like cherries in order to make them less awful. Eh.

My sister says that the banana flavour reminds her of medicine. Weird. Banana flavour should remind you of delicious banana rum and root beer. I'm thirsty. Laters.