Running Uphill

Running Uphill

I distract myself to pass the time

as my feet pound the pavement

yard by yard

travelling further than the day before

My thoughts unravel and I become conscious

of my burning quads and my lungs

gasping for air

I desperately search for a new distraction

a thought that will be stronger

stronger than the acid building up in my legs

a thought to bring strength back to my will

I dwell on the mistakes I made yesterday

and now it feels as if I'm running uphill

Today, I tried to run in the morning to avoid the rain and the heat of the day. I didn't actually start running until 10:30ish. It was humid as all -. I think the conditions were the toughest I've ran in so far this summer. I remember reading that it takes about 2 weeks for your body to acclimate to the heat. I guess I just need about another week of running in heat before I get a little more used to it. Then I'll be cool in all situations. As if.

Today was a hard run and I found myself lost in thought for some of it. It really does help to have something to distract you while you run. Sometimes I would think about stuff that happened years ago or last night. Whatever it takes to not think about putting one foot in front of the other and how much further I have to run before I can stop. Sometimes I ponder deep things like why do birds like to poo from some trees and not so much from other trees? Or am I more likely to have birds poo on me from trees if I run over the old poo spots on the sidewalk or try to avoid them? I didn't come to any solid conclusions but the thinking did help pass the kilometers. Any thoughts? Peace out.

Guard

Guard

I remembered it being easy

It was never this hard to see you

Constantly smiling at someone over my shoulder

It takes me a while every time

thinking that the smile was for me

I see it

The indifference in your eyes

that no longer surprises me

I didn't remember it being so hard

but I'm learning and keeping up my guard

Yeah, I didn't like how orange my blog was so I've changed it again. It might take me a while to settle on a design I like. Hopefully I'll be doing subtle changes and not these massive changes like I've been doing so far. I hope that I will converge on a design that I like with minor tweaks here and there.

Lately I've discovered a lot of books that I would like to read... but whenever there are a lot of new books I want to read, I end up in the comfort of reading old books. I'm reading Temple of the Winds again instead of Le Morte D'Arthur. Today's piece was inspired by my re-reading of book 4 from the sword of truth series.

It's hot. Oh so hot. Peace out.

Broken Strings

Broken Strings

Broken strings and other things of various use

clutter a shelf where things go to die

Collecting dust with papers of varying value

they grow yellower with time

Some with rhymes scribbled to be remembered

others a sketch or two drawn by hands more youthful

A broken bracelet and a misplaced book

treasures to behold on rainy spring days

in which cleaning is expected

Everyone has a drawer of misc. stuff where they throw things that don't really belong anywhere else. It's the first place you look for something but have no idea where to start looking. I have a shelf for that purpose as well. I keep my guitar strings there: new and old. I don't know why I keep my sets of old strings. There's nothing I can do with them. Maybe one day I'll build a galimoto (sorry... reading rainbow reference). I don't know why I keep them. I was actually holding a set of old strings today and I asked myself, "why am I keeping these?" and then I put them right back on the shelf.

Sometimes we like to keep things in our lives that we really have no purpose for. Maybe they remind us of happier time or maybe of sadder times. Maybe we hold onto things because we have a hard time letting go. Maybe we keep them so that we can remember and so that we'll never forget. It baggage in physical form. I'm no super hero. I'm not standing on a soap box preaching. In fact, I have boxes of these things. When it comes time to back up my computer (and you should do that from time to time... seriously!), it gets me thinking of all my possessions and I honestly think that if my entire room burnt down and I lost everything, I wouldn't really be all that sad because I'm not really attached to anything really... but at the same time I never throw anything away. Would that be irony? I don't think so. I don't think there is anything on the internet that has been unanimously deemed to be ironic. Why do smart people like to argue about what is ironic and what isn't? Anyways, I'm rambling. Peace out.

Vague Memories

Vague Memories

Vague memories cobbled together like scenes from last night's dream

working out and ice cream

gaussian blurred and overly compressed

memories based off my mental picture of you in that red dress

Walking down the hall

with me standing tall

proud to be there by your side

Come here and hide with me

help me distinguish the girl from the fantasy

Today, I started my 3rd week in my 10 week running program. Yay me. Oh yeah, before I forget... Google, thanks for the great new templates. It's good that even though blogs are so 2005, they can at least look a little more contemporary. Anyways, I was running and I saw this guy shooting free throws, which reminded me about the time when I was shooting free throws instead of studying for my finals because I was thinking about a girl, which reminded me about this other girl. This other girl was the inspiration for this piece.

She was a girl that I liked in elementary school. I don't remember too many things very clearly from those days. Actually that's not true. I do have some clear memories about those days but I don't trust them. I think I rewrote some things and just plain made up the rest. There's no one to keep me accountable. I don't even know what's real and what's not. It sounds like some plot from a bad movie, but I wonder if this happens to everyone. Do older individuals look back on their 30s and see it all as a blur? I remember this girl as being one of the most beautiful girls I've ever seen. I haven't seen her in almost 20 years. That's crazy but I'm fine with that because I also "remember" her liking me. That's right. I'm a stud. Anyone want to tell me that I'm misremembering this? Peace out.

Believe

Believe

Clay pots on cobble stones

blood flesh and bones

moaning under the constant pounding

of a runner's awkward gait

He dodges in and out

avoiding puddles from last night's rain

pushing doubt from his mind

he lies to himself

he is strong

he is fresh

and can keep going for miles

He smiles and concedes

sometimes it's harder to lie to yourself

when you never ever wanted to believe

Yup, nothing like another piece about running. Falling back into my comfort zone. I started a new running program last week. I like doing programs these days. It seems that when I just leave things up to chance or what I'm feeling, I don't have the same motivation. I'm doing a 10 week program to train for a 10k run. I'm on week 2 now. It's a podcast that let's me know what intervals to run/walk. I don't like dance music. I wish there was more of a selection.

Anyways, how often do we lie to ourselves? to psych ourselves up, or to trick ourselves into being confident? I wonder what psychologists have learned about the behaviour of lying to ourselves to gain an edge in a competitive environment. I dunno. I think this is only a half developed thought at best. Still mulling. Peace out.

Caught in the Rain

Caught in the Rain

got caught in the rain

a skip and stones throw from home

mad dash and wet socks

I don't want to bag on somebody's professional, but what do weathermen/women get paid to do? Whenever I watch the local news, I always skip the weather segments because I can easily get that information somewhere else without being teased to come back later for the full weather forecast after the commercial break. And even if I catch the weather because I don't have control of the remote, I don't take the forecast too seriously because it is usually wrong.

There was a sever thunder storm warning all day today but it didn't rain at all... until they lifted the warning at 4:04 pm and it started thunder storming at 4:30 pm. Good job guys. I was on a run and just barely got home in time before the hail started. Luckily I made sure to stay close to my house (on a short radius) as I ran. I'm fine. Thanks for being concerned. Peace out.

messes

messes

fix it all in haste

messes lead to more messes

slow down and stay calm

Have you ever created a mess and in your haste to clean it up, you only made things worse? I was thinking about that today when I was brushing my teeth. Maybe it's one of the major laws of motion. Maybe we need to come to a full stop before we can reverse directions and head towards fixing things instead of just messing things up more. I dunno. Think on that. Peace out.