Rain Again

Rain Again

I played a song this morning
I've missed the song
and I've missed the playing
the rain always threatening
the clouds just a few shades too light at the moment
leaves sit in puddles from yesterday's precipitation
and the grass is green in the crisp air of fall
I sit by the phone and wait for a call that seems
to haunt my waking hours
It never rings
but here comes the rain again

These dark, wet days are pretty exhausting.  They are perfect days to just stay in bed with a good book, read some pages of the good book, and then go back to bed after just a few pages to rest your eyes because they feel so heavy.  It's supposed to be a fair bit warmer and dryer in the next few days.  I guess that means I can go for some runs outside again.  I can't wait to turn my runners into treadmill shoes for the winter.  Running outside in the cold air hurts my jaw, ears and neck.  Peace out.

fight

fight

fight until the day turns to night

for a chance to feel joy

fight until the stars go back to bed

she might fall for this poor boy

work for the stuff you get

live without the annoying regret

I dunno. I just wanted to write something. Major garbage today. I just thought it would be interesting to follow "crime" with "fight", but that's about all the creative visionary inspiration I had for the day. Peace out.

Crime

Crime

I hid it somewhere safe so I wouldn't lose it

and I forgot about it with time

Out of sight, out of mind

I forgot all about you

what a crime

I was looking through my drawer today for something and I found or re-found a note that was written to me on a cue card. I think I've found this card several times throughout the years. I dunno when I got it. I wanna say she wrote it to me when I was 10? Maybe 11? I haven't really had any contact with her in forever. I think I've talked about her in the past. I tried to look her up on Facebook, but the profile that I think is most likely her has a dog as a profile pic. Oh well. Peace out.

Beck and Call

Beck and Call

I found joy in the memory

but I found even more in the anticipation

I caught your eye for once

but I want to catch the eyes of the nation

I danced the dance

but I'm starting to lose my patience

I'm waiting for you

to be becked and called at your convenience

I went over the 10K videos viewed on my Youtube channel today. The pessimist in me says that means that 10000 people clicked to watch my video and clicked away after the first 2 seconds. The optimist in me says that they stuck around for at least 5 seconds. It took me roughly two years to get these views. Sad. My views have been carried by my Duane Steele and Ashley Parker Angel covers. Yay me. Peace out.

easy to hard overnight

easy to hard overnight

why is it that

things are easier when you can't?

lying in bed - 2 AM

with ideas to change the world

things to do to change your life

places to go and people to see

but you can't

It's 2 AM

and nothing can be done

it will have to wait until morning

when things become hard once again

I think a lot of people can relate to today's piece. Things seem so easy when you can't actually do them. I know that I've had brilliant plans to wake up and run in the morning when the air is fresh and the heat of the day is not so oppressing, but I hardly do. It's hard in the morning. I just came back from a run, and the whole time I was running, I was thinking, "I'm gonna get home and do this and this and this" but when I got home and sat in front of my computer. It all seemed so hard. And I seemed so unsure.

Hmm... Maybe things aren't easier or harder. Maybe your level of sureness changes. I'm gonna call that girl. I'm gonna apply for that job. I'm gonna tell them how they make me feel. I'm gonna reach out and ask for help. We've all been there... lying awake at night, running 10k, driving home and we have grand schemes. We can see the future or so it seems. But then when it's time to "act", it seems so hard and you become so unsure. If only I could bottle sureness, I would find a way to sell it and profit. Peace out.

Like a Knife

Like a Knife

I haven't aged a day since I met you

but my hunger continues to grow

Your beauty, like a knife, has run me through

but I'll never tell and you'll never know

Here's a secret. I love this girl who used to be a tv star but now is a movie star slash tv star. Originally I had her name in this post, but I decided to take it out. I like the mystery. Ha. I was trying to remember when I first saw her and when I first liked her. It got me thinking... maybe we don't age when we like someone. Well, maybe I don't age when I like someone. It's as though, I'm trapped at that age, unwilling to move on... to grow up and put her aside. Of course, I'm not talking about this star anymore, but no name will be given as usual.

Actually, I don't think I'm phrasing things very well. I don't mean to say that people don't age and grow up. Maybe it's more like they want to revisit that memory all the time and in a way, they continue to go back in time to try to relive that day and to feel those feelings again - the feelings of yesterday. I suppose that's only something that people do if they don't get the girl. Otherwise, they would just live in the present with the girl in their arms. *sigh. Peace out.

I Don't Know the Stars

I Don't Know the Stars

I won't lie

I don't know the stars

They are a mystery to me

random lights in the night sky

I am lost

I can't find my way

Waiting for the light of day

to find my way through all the frost

I don't know the stars. It's a cliche that is found in a lot in books where people find themselves in unfamiliar lands and look at the stars and the stars feel foreign to them. Or maybe they return home from a far away land and is comforted by the familiar constellations in the night sky. I only know the big dipper and orion. I guess if I couldn't find those constellations in the sky, it would feel weird, but that's the limit of my familiarity with the skies. I don't even know if Orion can be seen all year round. I'm gonna guess that you can, cause I can always find it... but it's not like I look for it all that often. Peace out.

Burnt

Burnt

My imagination failed me again

I couldn't rewrite history with any flare

I only remember things as they were

It leaves me cold in the arctic air

And again I wonder if things would be better

if forgetting is something that can be learnt

Yesterdays memory forever erased

and I would forget how I was ever burnt

I was thinking about memory again today. Something that I like to think about from time to time. As though I revisit the idea to see whether or not I've subconsciously come up with something new. I was thinking about my memory and how I might not have a good memory. Maybe I just have a bad imagination. Maybe when I try to rewrite history (like everybody does), I just end up accidentally rewriting it "correctly" by accident due to my lack of creativity. I think that is an interesting concept. I do not not forget things. I'm just not imaginative enough to remember the wrong things. I'm not necessarily saying I think that's the case. It's just something I had fun thinking about today. Peace out.

Who Wants Pie?

Who Wants Pie?

Rose hips, tulips, finger tips

and chocolate milk

I remember them with rhyming schemes

machines of words

that make things easier to recall

mnemonics of a sort

I close my eyes to count the days

an imaginary finger tracing the calendar

marking an X on the past

I smelt the future the other day

it was fleeting

like a scent caught up in the wind

It smelled like jumping up and down

a joy yet undiscovered

like a pie that is still baking in the oven

I'm not sure what this is about. I'm a bit scatterbrained today with my thoughts all over the place. In my real life journal, I was rambling on and on about so many random disparate thoughts. I really think it's about time for some pie though. Peace out.

Productivity

Productivity

Turn off the lights on your way out

and lock the doors

You're no longer needed here anymore

and the things you did can go undone

we decided you weren't needed in the long run

The role you filled will sit empty

another empty chair at the meeting

The meeting room is not as full as it used to be

but surprisingly we haven't lost any productivity

I saw a news story a few weeks ago concerning job creation in the current recession. Even though orders are up and production is up, job creation has basically stayed stagnant. It just goes to show that in yesterday's world, companies needed to hire more people to get the same amount of stuff done by less people today. Companies were just bloated with a lot of dead weight. And now that they've cut the dead weight, they can be just as productive without having to hire more staff. Perhaps the current staff is being overworked or perhaps efficiencies have just been improved. Who knows and who is willing to admit that they were inefficient in the past or are currently over working their employees because they are too scared to hire more staff? It's lose-lose to admit one or the other. Peace out.