The Well

The Well

I keep going back to the well

hoping to find more words to say

something to write before the end of the day

My fear is that it will be empty

that I've ran out of my supply

that I've ran out of words... and I sigh

My hope is that I haven't wasted the ones I was given

on people that I love but yet haven't forgiven

Many writers think that they only have so many good words in them. I'm not talking about their vocabulary. I'm referring to how many great pieces they feel they can write. For some, it may be just a brilliant short story. Others may have a few novels in them. And yet others have the ability to write 1000s of words every day for their whole lives. I think it's the same way with song writers. People only have so many good songs in them. There comes a point when most writers think that their best writing days are behind them.

I've struggled with this a lot lately. Maybe my good writing days are behind me. Who knows. How many times can I sit down and want to write but find the well is empty? Sometimes I forget this blog is not really a place for me to write poems, but more of a place for me to write about stuff in general and introduce it with a poem.

I know that some writers have a strict schedule and they make themselves write 1000 or 2000 words a day or how many so pages. I think if I were to try to do something similar, I would end up writing about how I was struggling to find something to write about. Ha. Peace out.

Remote Control

Remote Control

I can't watch

allow me to avert my eyes

Let me fast forward

through this mistake

Help me break the rewind

so I can stop wasting all my time

reviewing the past

as if there was going to be a quiz

Stop and play she said

I hit pause and got lost in my own head

I watched a movie today. You'd probably guess that I watched Click, but you'd be wrong. I watched 500 Days of Summer. Can't go wrong with Zooey Deschanel and Minka Kelly. Ha. It seems like Zooey plays the exact same girl-who-can't-be-tamed character in all her movies. I hate that girl, but I love that girl. Maybe that's the appeal. Maybe that's my flaw. Peace out.

Proof

Proof

I've seen the pictures

I know it's true

There's no longer any chance

for me and you

I've seen the proof

No need for anymore evidence

The stories have been written

They are spoken about in past tense

I dunno. Sometimes you can talk yourself into believing something but when you see pictures, it becomes increasingly hard to lie to yourself. I know that a lot of things can be faked with photoshop. I've done my share of doctoring images but sometimes a photo can be the final nail in the coffin. Peace out.

Driving

Driving

I really hate it

bullies driving everywhere

Must I always yield?

I hate driving. I'd rather bus somewhere or walk even though it takes much longer. I hate driving because there are so many other people on the road and you have to work with them... and most of the time, I don't think they are working with me. Sometimes I feel like there are a lot of bullies on the road. Like when people cut you off. I mean, I could not let them in and hit them but that's more a hassle than anything else.

Today on my way home, I felt like a pedestrian bullied me. It was fairly dark on a fairly quiet road and she totally decided to cross in front of me even though there were no cars behind me. And then she decided that she would walk as slow as she possibly could. At that moment, I was wishing that there was some authority figure next to me that I could ask for permission to run her over. I hate entitled pedestrians. We should be allowed to hit them. **This goes nicely with my other rants about how I hate drivers and I wished that I was allowed to just kick their cars. Ha. Peace out.

Shotgun Wedding

Shotgun Wedding

Shotgun wedding

pregnant bride

belly showing

when viewed from the side

An awkward father

emotions torn

They pushed up the date

to before the baby was born

Yeah. Not really a normal topic that I write about. Today, I just found out that a person that I was following on Youtube because I thought she was a wholesome girl and had a good message was due today. Which is all and good but then I remembered that she got married in March and I did some quick finger counting math.

Sometimes people aren't really who you think they are. How well can you know someone without actually knowing them. I don't really mean to judge because I know that I'm not perfect. And that people can't always live up to your expectations of them. And maybe sometimes your expectations of them aren't fair in the first place, but... I dunno. Sometimes it's just so easy to judge and point fingers. Not sure where I was going with this thought. Peace out.

Pearls

Pearls

Yesterday we went diving for pearls

but the whole time I was wishing you were another girl

Maybe I was just trying to show my mettle

but the whole time I was thinking we both decided to settle

We said our vows

and danced the dance

cut the cake

and taken our bows

Back at the rooms

the show is over

what do we do now?

It's monday so that means another Bachelorette inspired piece. Frank broke Ali for the 2 guys left. Good job dude. And why did he need to bring a suitcase to do what he did? I would think that it would be more of a single backpack situation. And is Ali wearing the flower on the other side of her hair after the Frank incident significant? Who really cares right? Peace out.

Silent Clocks

Silent Clocks

When did the clocks go silent?

The LCD panels coming on and off

with no moving gears to make sound

Time has lost its gravity

Its heaviness

The ground is covered by coloured leaves

before you even notice the seasons change

You can still remember clearly the spring rains

And tomorrow is just another day of more of the same

Watched the Messenger today. Actually, I'm watching it right now. I watched it a while back, but I like to watch movies 2x... whether they're good or bad, I just like to watch movies twice because it allows me time to process it and see the details. What a sad movie. What a sad job. It's about the soldiers who have to tell next of kin their loved ones have died. *sigh. Peace out.

Aim for Me

Aim for Me

I know that maybe we weren't each other's destinies

but I had hoped that at one point you would have aimed for me

Short and sweet. This was the first piece that I've written based on an idea I jotted down in my new journal. Haha. Actually, it's hardly more than the idea itself. I watched Time Traveler's Wife today. It's a fairly emotional movie but when I watched it, I felt really sad for Rachel McAdams the actress. I love her and I wish she were happy and married in real life. Maybe she is and I'm behind with hollywood but I just remember the days when they were announcing her break ups and I was thinking that I wish she could be happy. *sigh. Peace out.

Obscure the Sun

Obscure the Sun

I can run and run

but the pain always catches up with me

My knees start to ache

the stitches in my sides show no mercy

I ran and ran today

but the truth always caught up with me

I told lies to keep going

but my acid soaked legs could always see

A lot can happen during an hour run

Clouds move in to obscure the sun

I ran my first 10k this year today. Actually, I walk/ran it but it was still probably the fastest I've ever done it. A lot of stuff can happen when you run 10k. I went through so many different emotions. I thought so many different thoughts. Time itself seemed to warp. I remember rehashing a thought I had around the 3k mark around the 9k mark and I was like, "I'm such a different guy now then I was when I thought that thought before." I made some kid wipe out on his bike. He thought he could squeeze between me and a bush but when he realized he couldn't, he tried to stop and completely wiped out. It wasn't my fault. He biked by me once and then tried to bike by me again. This other little girl decided that she would run about 40 meters with me and then her friend followed me for a block and a half on her bike. A cute red head smiled at me as she drove by. Ha. I was 1/3 of the way into the run and that really helped. I was so tired but that event gave my mental battery a little jolt. Magical really. Peace out.

Wishing Well

Wishing Well

Nickel and dime me for all that I own

I've grown used to the lies that you tell

Believe these words or read between the lines

I've thrown my last penny in the wishing well

What's the deal with wishing wells? I remember as a young kid, loving to throw money into fountains. I don't think I enjoyed it because I actually believed that if I made a wish and threw money into the fountain that my wish would come true. I think it was more of the act of throwing money away. I also liked trying to throw coins at hard to reach places to see if I couldn't brag about it later to no one in particular. Peace out.

The Sirens

The Sirens

The sirens sound again tonight

I suppose another person needs saving

My stomach growls craving

the savory snacks that taste oh so good

I'm in the mood to read a familiar book

I look and find one suitable

Something to past the time

until I fall asleep

a dreamless night is all I seek

Yeah, I dunno. It seems as though I hear sirens here now every night. I dunno what they are for. I don't hear much about things on the news the next day so that's good I guess. Peace out.

Bouncing Ideas

Bouncing Ideas

I wrote something beautiful

and tossed it into the air between my ears

to be lost as the seconds become minutes

I was a genius once

with ideas bouncing around my head

but they lost energy with time and grew still

Only to rattle around a bit

as I lie awake in bed

I've lost most of my good ideas I think. They come to me and I'm too lazy to write them down and then they are gone. Today, I watched Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. I've probably mentioned that movie before. It's like 1 of 4 movies that I own. I don't know how many times I've watched it. Every time I watch it, it feels like I'm watching it for the 2nd time. Maybe I've only watched it 3 times. I dunno. It has a familiar feel and yet I don't know what scene comes next. Perhaps it's because it's not a linear storyline.

Anyways, I want to write my thoughts more so I dusted off an old notebook that I probably bought the previous time I had the notion to write down my thoughts more. It was empty so perhaps I hadn't started yet. This blog has been a blessing and a curse when it comes to remembering things. I know that I do write a lot of my stuff based on personal things but sometimes I'm too cryptic for me to even figure out what I was writing about months ago. It sucks though cause I already know that sometimes writing things down will seem redundant and slow. Who has time to write down their thoughts? When I have thoughts, I'm too busy thinking them. Peace out.

Waking Up

Waking Up

I woke up this morning with the sun

from a dream that breaks my waking heart

What a day and it's only just begun

It seems like today is the day things fall apart

I was up at 5 this morning. It's surprisingly bright at that hour. I have some wake up stress cause I'm expecting a call from a guy who's supposed to fix my garage door opener. I don't like having this wake up stress. It pretty much guarantees that I will not get a good night's sleep. I'm tired. Peace out.

You Don't Want this Song to be Written about You

You Don't Want this Song to be Written about You

Walk me to the car in the rain

It serves you right after the choices you made tonight

I know that it can only turn out wrong

when I write this story in a country song

Haha, watched the Bachelorette tonight. Good stuff. Train wreck tv for sure. I can't turn away. Sometimes I wonder how much the editors shape the show but somethings you can't edit. Sometimes they actually say the words that are aired. Peace out.

Parade

Parade

Parade of ants

marching in the heat

traversing concrete playgrounds

looking for food

Did my longest run of the season today. I'm like a zombie when I run... just lost in my own world. Running into tree branches and such. Luckily, I'm still alert enough to check for cars when I'm crossing streets.

I saw this huge parade of ants on this sidewalk. If it was a highway, there would have been 20 lanes. I wonder what they were doing. Maybe they were moving... unhappy with their current home. Oh to be an ant. Just imagine how strong I'd be. Peace out.

disparate thoughts

disparate thoughts

I feel the heat

as it drains the strength from my legs

I drag and drag

my iPod barely louder than the voice in my head

stop running it says

I feel the dread

as the day comes looming around the corner

time flies and flies

my iPod barely louder than the voice in my head

It's over it says

What's it like to wake up in the morning

knowing that a girl loves you?

I bet it's better than I think

If you love me click this link

Yeah, I know. Today's piece is a bit scatterbrained. I just wanted to write something and I got a little distracted half way through. Not sure about my blog design still. I'm not married to the green yet.

It's been crazy hot these past days. I guess that's how summer is here... hot, humid, sunny afternoons and thunderstorm evenings. The heat is stronger than me. Peace out.