Tuesday, September 30, 2008

!shake

!shake

shadow and light
fight each other to form shape
light hits my eyes
and is translated to chemicals that with lightning flight
travel to my brain 
where it forms into an idea
of beauty
it becomes the foundation of a dream
that try as I might
I can't shake

Hmm... at first, I titled this thing "distorted" because I wanted to write something based on tonight's episode of House.  This artist had a thing where he couldn't see things properly and images were distorted in his mind, but as I kept writing, I didn't feel like it was heading in that direction.  Oh well, this is just as good I guess.  Peace out.  Oh yeah, went for a run today and it was my crappiest run in like a month... no legs.  Aiya.  Peace out again.

Monday, September 29, 2008

Greatest Hits (3)

Greatest Hits (3)

A rediculous submarine bun
acts as the carb prison for six delicious burger patties
who knows how many slices of tomatoes and leaves of lettuce
one knife and fork
a chance to become a legend
some great moments can be about her
but this one is about defeating the monster burger

Lolz.  Just watched HIMYM and it was about the greatest burger in the world.  It made me think about the time I ate the monster burger at Red Top.  I have a crappy cell phone picture of me and that beast of a burger.  It's 6 patties stacked in 2 columns of 3 patties on a sub bun and there's lettuce, tomatoes and I believe there is chili.  I'm not sure if there was cheese or not.  But it was awesome, and big... really big.  I won't say that it was the best burger I've ever eaten but it was probably the largest.  Unfortunately those days are now behind me.  I can't eat that big any more.  Now I'm all about losing the weight and putting miles on my legs.

Sometimes great memories can be about that one magical moment that you shared with that one special girl, but sometimes great moments are simple meals with friends and eating big.  Here's to the days of eating big... and may they never come around again.  Peace out.

Sunday, September 28, 2008

Scary Mystery

Scary Mystery

It's a scary mystery
the kind that makes your stomach turn
and causes you to lose your appetite
maybe you would have more energy
but it's keeping you up all bloody night
Someone is sick
and the doctors are confused
You wait in emergency rooms
but if they don't know, what's the use

Television shows like House are fun to watch because they're fictional.  But, yeah, it's frustrating when people you know get sick and the doctors can't tell them what it is... and then they tell you to go see a specialist but you have to wait forever for an appointment.  The health care system totally sucks.  I won't say more because I've actually been getting some hits on this blog now and I don't know who's reading this so whatever.  Peace out.

Saturday, September 27, 2008

New Melody

New Melody

The phrasing is strange
when should I breathe?
lyrics hidden on my arm
covered with my sleeve
I sing with shaky voice
on your wedding day
I barely know this song
but because you asked, I'll play

Yeah, so I'm working on learning some new songs for a wedding I'm playing at in 6 days?  7?  I dunno.  Depends on how you do the math I guess.  I'm not sure if I ever want to do another wedding.  I really don't know why I keep saying yes anyways.  I don't like performing.  I don't really like my voice all that much and I'm a fairly lousy guitarist.  Oh well.  Hopefully this is the last one for me.

So I've been trying to learn the Taylor Swift song "White Horse" because I claim the concept of the song.  Anyways, I was looking for some clips on YouTube and I started watching all these people doing Taylor Swift covers.  It made me really want to do one but I dunno what song I would do.  Weird huh?  I don't like performing but I have a YouTube account.  I'm glad that my YouTube account is even more secret than this blog (which is not all that secret) but not many people have stumbled upon it as of yet.  Whatever.  Peace out.

Impossible

Impossible

The fairy tale is impossible
because my fairy tale would have yours come true
but our dreams are mutually exclusive
perhaps if I could travel back in time to you
and make it so that he never existed
or at least have you not insist it
that you would wait for him
that you would spruce, fir and pine
for that one man for all that time
perhaps the LHC could find a way
to take me back to that one root day
to stop the seed that grew to be a mighty conifer
so that you would be mine and me yours

Lolz.  That conifer line was soooo forced but whatever.  Actually, I hit a huge road block writing that today.  When I started, I was really excited because I just finished watching the Grey's Anatomy season premiere and a new song by Taylor Swift debuted.  It is titled "white horse" and the chorus talks about a princess and how it's not a fairytale.  The concept of the song really reminded me of my poem "sorta fairytale".  I am claiming partial song writing credits even though I totally stole the title of the poem from somewhere else.  

Sometimes storms come and go and you realize that there is nothing you can do about them now.  But maybe if you had the foreknowledge, you could go back in time and stop that stupid butterfly from flapping its wings and causing the hurricanes in your life: the stupid butterfly effect.  The LHC is currently down due to a helium leak, but perhaps when it's up and running again, they will unlock the secret of time travel and the impossible fairytales will be possible for the few who can buy their dreams.  But at the moment, my fairytales are impossible.  Peace out.

Thursday, September 25, 2008

What?

What?

what's going on?  does anybody know?
who's supposed to be doing sound right now?
why is my shirt as white as snow?
dang, now my thumbs are bleeding
people start to panic but I tell them it doesn't hurt
I look down and notice all the blood dripping onto my shirt
I went to the doctor so he could check me out
he told me not to worry
I just had a typical case of gout

What?  Exactly.  That's what I was thinking this morning when I woke up from a series of strange dreams.  I remembered a lot more when I got out of bed but I didn't write anything down so, obviously, I don't remember alot of the stuff that I remembered right when I woke up.  I remember that for some reason I was playing football in a pure white shirt and I was totally getting it dirty and when I went to the doctor, he told to bend my thumb on my dominant hand.  I bent my right thumb and it was stiff and he said that it was a clear case of gout.  Who can argue with a man who plays a doctor in my dreams?  Peace out.  (For those concerned, my thumbs are fine in real life.)

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

The Storm

The Storm

No one really saw it coming
Skies were clear as the sun was setting
A gentle breeze blows in from the East
It caught them unawares, they were not ready in the least
Enter the storm from stage right
They could tell by the rain and wind that it would be a long night
The storm comes and goes
It leaves them shattered and cares not for their woes

Yeah, kinda late I know.  Storm news has kinda come and gone like it does every year.  Sometimes I forget that these storms happen every single year.  I remember that I forgot what time of year these storms happened.  I wasn't sure when we went to Disney World 2 years ago if it was hurricane season or not.  I believe, for some reason, that I thought the spring time was hurricane season.  I was wrong, but luckily our trip wasn't affected too much by rain or storms.

Sometimes "storms" can come into our lives.  It's weird how they can come quickly out of nowhere and then just disappear again.  And like real storms, they don't seem to care what kinda condition they leave you in.  Sometimes I wonder what the purpose of storms.  Is it just an extreme case of the water cycle in action?  I dunno.  Peace out.

Monday, September 22, 2008

The Pursuit

The Pursuit

They have a half days head start on us
and carry our two comrades away with them
We might catch them if we rush

We track them across the plains of Rohan
we've already made up 3 hours
Hopefully we'll see our friends again

2 days with little sleep and my legs are burning
The orcs of the white hand are just over the next hill
There's a new found hope and our strength is returning

So this morning when I got out of bed, I started wondering how many miles could I cover in a day if I tried my hardest.  I was thinking of the beginning of Tolkien's Two Towers and how Aragorn, Gimli and Legolas were pursuing the Orcs in order to rescue Merry and Pippen.  I wonder if I could cover a marathon distance in a 24 hour period.  How often would I need to eat?  How often would I need to stop?  How many days would it take me to recover?  I dunno.  I think I want to try that some day after the LCC.  I think it would be an interesting experiment indeed.  How long will my mind hold up before I just quit?  Sometimes, when I run, I try to pretend that a big nasty dog is chasing me.  That method doesn't work for very long.  Maybe I'm not gullible enough.  Who knows.  Peace out.

Sunday, September 21, 2008

Despair

Despair

They say that Despair has no boundaries
no one has ever been able to explore it all
A few have ventured in head first, legs running
but eventually Despair takes them and they slow to a crawl
They underestimate how thick Despair can be
a machete alone will not be your deliverer
Its vines grab hold of you, squeeze you
Until you forsake all dreams of her
and settle for an unfinished map of the region
They say that Despair has no boundaries
I'm trapped inside and none can be seen

Nice, I really like that one.  The idea of mapping an area called Despair was inspired by a passage in Morgenstern's sequel to The Princess Bride, "Buttercup's Baby".  When I read the section about how the cartographers never bothered to map out the region, it reminded me of the island in C.S. Lewis' Voyage of the Dawn Treader.  There's an island where all your dreams come true... sounds good at first but then you find out that all your darkest/scariest nightmares come true.  When I read about Despair, I kinda imagined it to be some what like the island of nightmares.  Well, at least those are the influences I based this poem on.

Today's sermon was on joy and I also listened to the sermon from Elim Chapel online today and it too was on joy.  I just thought it would be more interesting to write about despair however.  Oh well.  Yesterday, I read through all my poems again and I really love some of them.  Of course, others are not so great but some pieces I can honestly say that I'm proud of.  When I started writing today, I started to think that I wouldn't be able to write something great again.  That maybe I was all tapped out.  As though all my best pieces were behind me.  I felt desparaged and I turned that around and wrote something... just like how a true artist would do it and in this blog, I'm pretending to be a true artist.   Hmmm.... didn't I write something about pretending?  Peace out.

Saturday, September 20, 2008

As You Wish

As You Wish

"As you wish" said the farm boy
but this was only his way of being coy
he really meant "I love you"
It took 17 years before she knew
but by then it was too late
he was heading to america to maybe become great
and return and take her with him
but everything started to look grim
when he was at sea, off the Carolina coast
the Dread Pirate Roberts killed him

I read the Princess Bride today.  I'm not sure why I've never read it before.  It totally is a book that people would assume that I would have read and loved.  I've seen the movie a tonne of times and I've always enjoyed it.   But after reading the book, I love it all the more.  I think the way these books are written, boys are supposed to think that they are Westley and the girls dream about a guy like Westley rescuing them, but in reality the other characters in the book need actors too.  Maybe you're not the lead in the story.  Maybe you're Prince Humperdinck the jerk hunter.  Or maybe you're Fezzik the dumb giant.  Hmmm... that idea reminds me of the season premiere of House.  Not everyone is destined to have wings.  Sometimes you have to settle for being the assistant to the high flyer.  Something to think about for sure.  Peace out.

Friday, September 19, 2008

Geographically Restless

Geographically Restless

My legs are still
my mind is racing
it longs for a new setting
different people with new faces
new experiences in unfamiliar places
My future path is cloudy and my 
heart is geographically restless

Lately, I've been having urges to maybe change churches or change cities or just something drastic, dramatic, life altering.  I dunno.  That's just the feeling I have right now.  Of course, if I think hard, I could come up with reasons for all that junk but I don't want to think hard at the moment.  I don't want to be comtemplative.  I just want to pump some weights and put some miles on my legs.

I've started keeping track of the miles I've travelled since getting the treadmill.  After 2 weeks I've travelled 36 miles.  That's just a day or two away from Portage La Prairie.  I'm tracking my progress on a google map.  Once I figure out a good way to put that on this page, I will.  I haven't decided if I want to just link to it or embed it.  Anyways, peace out.

Thursday, September 18, 2008

A Life of Lines

A Life of Lines

Something happens now
and you need to be clever
say it with one line

Yeah, missed a day yesterday.  Oh well... and today is back to simple stuff.  I've been told that I'm good at one liners.  Maybe that's all I got.  My poems are so short.  Maybe I would be better with only writing one line a day instead of trying to write so much.  I've had some books in mind that I've wanted to write for years.  Many of them are just inspired by one line.  I was watching a bit of Biggest Loser the other day and I came up with an awful proposal.  Something like, "so and so, would you marry me and join me on Biggest Losers family?"  Hahaha, because this season they are taking husband/wife, or parent/child teams only.  That would be something fun to put in a book titled "The Don'ts of Engagement".  I'm also reading a book about sleep right now because I haven't been able to sleep very well lately.   I was thinking that the book should start off saying, "if you're reading this book right now and you should be sleeping, you're already doing something wrong."  Peace out.

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Waiting

Waiting

It's as if they don't know that they should be here by now
It's as if they don't have any desire to see it
to see me
playing my heart out
as a joke
but not a joke at the same time
maybe it's secretly about someone else
maybe it's about you
maybe it's about me waiting for you
clicking and waiting
sitting and waiting
sleeping and waiting
breathing and waiting

Yeah, so I made this youtube video today as a joke and only one person has seen it so far.  It's been over 8 hours now that people could have seen it.  It's just a click away in their inbox.  I guess people don't care enough to see it.  I don't know how long it's gonna be up.  Probably not much longer really.  I don't really need that video floating out there for the rest of my life.  I've included this little blurb in this blog so that in the future it doesn't haunt me.  I pretended to be singing to this one girl but I really was thinking of something else.  Someone secret... because there's always someone secret... even if you're with someone, there's always someone secret.  Your fairytale.  There's that word again.  People hate my theory about fairy tales but that's because I always put it in the negative sense.  Peace out.

Monday, September 15, 2008

Dance

Dance

It's 2am and I'm howling at the moon
you appeared from around the corner
with your flowing blonde hair
I say, "come sit. talk. grab a chair"
It's 10 years later, I still think of her

New York is beautiful in the fall
free concerts are given nightly at central park
why didn't you come and meet me there
you, the girl with the beautiful hair
I waited and waited for you by the arch

The stars must have aligned
the moon is smiling down on us
as we, by chance
stumble across each other
fated perhaps to share a dance
and then return to our separate lives of emptiness

Hmmm... I watched the movie August Rush yesterday and this was kinda inspired by it but I changed a few things.  I don't know why Keri Russell never got bigger than she did.  She's got great hair.  I took the liberties (like I usually do) to change some aspects of the storyline.  Originally, I had titled this thing "arch" because that was a main part of the storyline... well, kinda.  People always made arrangements to meet at the arch, but I felt like "dance" would be a more suitable title after I finished writing it.  And I think it fits my style of titles a lot more.  Lately, I 've been picking titles and then forcing the poem to fit it but I guess today is different, but more of the same.  Man, I have been watching too much american election coverage.  Peace out.

Sunday, September 14, 2008

sick

sick

I'm sick
of all these games
of pretending that we are on the same side
or that we even share some common ground
on issues of little importance
or things that probably only matter to me

Actually feeling really uninspired right now and I'm just rushing to get something done because I want to go and watch tv and it's getting late.  I've been doing this 6 week pushup plan and I've done week 5 twice already and I think I need to do it again this week because I'm so not ready for week 6.  I actually feel like throwing up.  It's not a common feeling from doing pushups for me.   I sometimes feel like this after an intense squat work out but this is definitely just as hard.  And I got an email just now that makes me kinda sick... and fairly angry but w/e.  Peace out.

Saturday, September 13, 2008

Pretend

Pretend

We pretend that we are dating
but what people don't know is that
we're just working together
it's all just an act

We pretend that we are friends
but what you don't know is this
sometimes I wish that we were more
I thought you might too because of the kiss

But now we pretend that it never happened
because he's back.  Your old boyfriend
He's alive and we are dead
but whatever, it was all just pretend

Hmm.. sometimes reruns on tv are boring but there are some episodes that I like rewatching.  Tonight, I watched the episode of Chuck where he and Sarah kiss for the first time I believe.  If that was a spoiler for anyone, too bad.  Anyways, this piece was inspired by that.  Can't wait to see what the dude from the Buy More does in the new season and how his love life can be toyed with by the writers.  Peace out.

Friday, September 12, 2008

It Goes Without Saying

It Goes Without Saying

It goes without saying
that I'm thinking about staying
up a little later than normal tonight
I hope you think that's alright
because earlier I should have been more bold
and told you that you are beautiful
but of course that goes without saying

I dunno what that was about.  Last.fm sometimes just gets me thinking of some stuff and the usual junk comes out.  Honestly, now that I've been doing this again for more than a week, I'm starting to struggle a little.  It almost feels like a chore today.  Today, I didn't use the treadmill or do any running outside.  I'm feeling a bit worn out.  And I knew that I have to run 5 miles tomorrow so I decided to take it easy today.  Hmmm.. Last.fm is playing Keith Urban's "You'll think of me".  What a great song.  Peace out.

Thursday, September 11, 2008

Familiar Loop

Familiar Loop

Things seem eerily familiar
it's as if they know their order
you smile, i smile, we talk, we walk
and then it ends
it has happened before and it will happen again
I can't help but be myself around you
you wish I was less but sometimes more
like waves crashing the caribbean shores
the familiarity is wearing
my heart strings, tearing
I'm tired and pooped
we've re-entered our familiar loop

Hmmm... I kinda like how that one turned out.  The ending was kinda forced when I was writing it but I think it reads alright.  This morning, I woke up and felt like listening to my Kate Walsh CD.  Some may think that Kate Walsh is Dr. Addison Montgomery from Grey's and now Private Practice but apparently there is another Kate Walsh out there who's a singer/songwriter.  I discovered her on iTunes.  Her claim to fame is that she recorded the CD in her friend's basement and that's why the album is called Tim's House.  But anyways, I was listening to the CD and there's a track called "Don't break my heart again" or something like that.  At least the chorus goes something like that.  I'm not actually sure if that's the title of the song.  Anyways, that song was the inspiration for today's piece... that song and some post Settlers of Catan discussion yesterday evening.  It was more hilarious than anything.  I'm just so funny sometimes.  Peace out.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

An Exercise in Complaining

An Exercise in Complaining

I hate that it rains when I have to go out
why can't people be on time?
how come only girls can pout?
I don't think good poems should rhyme
Lame

Yeah, I'm currently reading through the book of Job in my bible reading program.  A few years ago, I read Job from beginning to end in one sitting.  I truly believe that is how Job was meant to be read.  The snippets at a time model is not really doing it for me.  I can complain so well typically, but I guess I wasn't feeling it today.

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Shoot the Moon

Shoot the Moon

your heart is racing as you're running
running around the neighborhood
you're not running for any particular reason
you just think that it might do you a little good

the wind is gusting, just a bit
I hope you're done soon
your legs are getting tired, knees wobbly
if you quit now, how will you shoot the moon?

There's this Bryan Adams song on the Hope Floats soundtrack that means a lot to me and in the song there's this line about shooting the moon if you love someone.  However, that's not what inspired this piece.  There's a common game at carnivals where you have to get this bowling ball to go up hill by correctly pulling apart the two rods that it rests on.  I'm explaining it poorly but essentially, you have to pull sticks apart at the correct rate so that the ball builds momentum and is able to go uphill but you don't want to pull them apart too quickly because if that happens the ball will drop.  Anyways, I've heard people refer to that game as "shooting the moon".

So I ran outside for the first time today since Thursday (first day since I got the treadmill that I haven't been on it).  And there's one thing that running on a treadmill doesn't really prepare you for.  Some would argue that there's more than just one thing but today for my purposes, I'm going to pretend that there is only one thing.  Wind.  Wind sucks when you're tired and running.  I run around my block a few times and so I'm pretty much facing all the points of the compass.  The weird thing is that if it's windy, I'm usually running into the wind for 3 orientations of the 4.  Today, the wind wasn't that bad but it was so very close to breaking my spirit.  I need to revise my 6 mile route.  There are too many opportunities for me to quit and just walk home.  Another thing I'm trying to balance is my speed.  I know that the faster I run, the sooner it will be over and the slower I run, the more I prolong the pain.  I am bad at finding balance.  I always make the wrong decision when it comes to tempo and pacing.  And the wrong decision just leads to pain (if the will stays strong) or walking home feeling defeated.



Monday, September 8, 2008

A Sorta Fairytale

A Sorta Fairytale

boom pa boom boom boom pa
the steady bass line resonants from the tips of your toes to the top of your head
your hair tingles with every vibration
it only serves to distract you from your story
a sorta fairytale
this one doesn't end well
the writer was a maverick
who believed that happy endings were cliche
you blew it
you have to admit that it's a bit disarming
to find out that you're not prince charming
and that beauty there, standing over there, in that yellow dress
she's not your princess
and things don't end with a happily ever after
they just end 
with no fan fare

I don't know what that was about.  All I had at the start was a song title.  Recently, I started using Last.FM as my online radio station and it suggested this song by Tori Amos called "a sorta fairytale".   I just stole the title.  I didn't even really listen to the song so I don't know what the song is about but I just really like the word "fairytale" and decided to go with it.  Lol, I absolutely have no idea what the first part of the poem is about.  I don't even think it's necessary but who am I to edit?  Anyways, the word "fairytale" is something that I adapted into my terminology a few years back.  I had forgotten when I picked it up until recently when I re-remembered.  But that's another story.

I love fairytales.  I'm sure I've mentioned that before somewhere in the previous pages of writing.  Or perhaps you can guess that I love fairytales by looking at my favourite books.  Sometimes I think that the modern fairytale is the typical chick flick.  I watched two over the weekend:  "Definitely, maybe" and "I'm Reed Fish".  The endings in these stories are hardly ever realistic.  How can you blow things or miss your chance with this awesome girl and then years later get a chance with her again?  It's just not real life.  In real life, that girl is married already.  Not every one can play the lead in the movie.  Sometimes you're just the dorky friend.  Fish out.

Sunday, September 7, 2008

Glance

Glance

She asked me how I did it
how I always seemed to know
It's as though I had a sixth sense of when she entered the room
She asked if perhaps it was the cadence of her walk
the scent of her perfume by chance
I told her that it was the weight of her glance

Hmmm... that didn't come out exactly how I planned but I got a little stuck so I just ended it.  As I was lying in bed last night listening to a podcast, I was struck by the phrase "weight of a glance" or something like that so I made a mental note that I wanted to write something with that line in it.  I've always felt like I could sense certain people's presence.  Now I'm not saying that I can actually feel their glance but I just think it's a marvelous concept.  I know that sometimes a stare from a certain someone can be so heavy that it just wants to knock you to the ground or force you to sit down because your knees feel weak.  Lame, I know but that's kinda the concept I was trying to go for but unfortunately, I just didn't quite get there.  Oh well, the good thing about writing more is that I get many chances.

I did 30 minutes of walking on the treadmill.  I technically didn't break any rules because I did not run today.  I'm actually not supposed to run on it until Thursday according to my schedule but I'm finding it hard to stay off of it.


Saturday, September 6, 2008

Johanna

Johanna

Johanna
the girl with the yellow hair
she sits by her second story window
longing to breathe in the fresh air
longing for her sailor
the boy from the sea
to maybe rescue her and take her to be
free
safe
happy
loved

Hmmm... I guess now that I'm trying to do this more often, it's inevitable that I'll be writing some real garbage pieces now and again. Unfortunately I didn't think that I would be writing crap on my second day back. Today, I watched Sweeny Todd: The demon barber of fleet street... or something like that. The only real catchy tune was the one about "Johanna". I dunno. I don't understand how they can get away with having only one good song in a musical. The story was dumb too. It was like a modern twist on a Shakespearian tragedy except even lamer. Oh well, good thing I only spent a dollar to watch it.

I was rereading some of the old poems and I realized that there are so many garbage pieces. I do, though, have some favourites. I like "the eternal week" and "night train" for their sad yet beautiful tones. I like "dirt" and "april showers" for their emo-ness. I like "rachel" because I actually got her name wrong. I like my series of "greatest hits" and hopefully I can write some more in that series... for sure I need to include my new love affair with the treadmill. I want to run on it all the time but my current running program only has me running 3 times a week and I would like to run at least one of those times outside. Here's to not hurting myself and being wise with taking care of my body. Peace out.

Treadmills

Treadmills

Treadmills are for people who like pain
they allow you to run without having to run in the rain
Treadmills allow you to train as if you're going uphill
they allow you to stop when you want when you've had your fill
... and you don't have to walk home
cause you're already there

Yup, so my sister and I got a treadmill today. The model claims that it takes 2 people less than 1 hour to assemble it. Liars. And who knew that treadmills would be so heavy? Guess what, they are heavy. I'm not sure what I want to do now that I have a treadmill. I've been running outside just fine all summer but I guess it will come in handy when winter rolls around. At least now I can run in the winter and I won't have to start from scratch every spring like I've been doing for the past years. Tomorrow is my first "intervals" run. I started a new running program to help improve my 10k times. Apparently if I just go out and run aimlessly, my times won't improve. Oh well, I guess we'll see.

Anyways, I haven't written in such a long time but I want to get back into the act again. I don't want to commit to starting a new streak but I do want to write more. I've had some good ideas lately and hopefully I will attempt to write some pieces later on this week.